The disease of Judgement and
​it's many layers

by Sahar Gharachorlou

I was speaking to a gentleman regarding certain emotions and discussing how vulnerable we are when it comes to addressing or even acknowledging emotions as we go through life.

It seems it becomes even more difficult with age, since more is expected. As if, as we age we become the wizard of OZ and should never ever make any mistakes. Age seems to be waiting to punish us and asks us to become a superhero of a kind. Age seems to take away the freedom of being human. Every new year of life comes with a stronger form of the same condition & it reads; 'no more mistakes'.

As he was expressing what he felt for different people at different times, I was aware of how the rawness of his statements was making me feel uneasy. I caught myself a dozen times judging him, his emotions, myself & my reactions, my unspoken resistance, nonverbal discomfort and the eagerness to end the conversation. I realized how his truth was making me uncomfortable. After disconnecting the call, I felt like a hypocrite and probably because at that moment I was.
​
How can we expect people to be honest and truthful when we don't feel comfortable or even debunk them if they are being themselves. I am not even starting on,- us being honest-, that's yet another question mark.

Why do we have so many masks? What got us to this stage that we are enslaved by our own judgements?

We ridicule people who express freely, label them as emotional, too sensitive, immature, impulsive etc. Every single one of us is looking for honest, loyal, truthful partner/ friend or relationship while when people speak their truth it makes us so very uneasy, we immediately judge them and conclude whether we want to even know them or not.

This gentleman and the conversation have got me to relook at many layers of judgement, has opened a new multi layers of myself where I need to dig and clean loads of judgement webs that's keeping my spirit so caught. I realize as always, everything stems from inside. While most of us try to be authentic and honest in our relationships outside, the bigger question is how authentic we are within? Why do we have so many unnecessary conditions, judgements, paradigms which are only harming us and taking away the joy of being fully present?

I know I have loads of work to do, what about you? Where have you lost being true to yourself?

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