It's time to revere the dead, our departed Ancestors thats what we do on the days of Shradh. We remember our 'Pitras', our late ancestors, and pay obeisance to them. I write today on our mothers/ Mama/Maa who are no more. Some may have left us very early when we were toddlers or lil, and needed them the most, some in their mid lives when we were growing into young women and needed their love n guidance, some later when they had turned into Naanis, as we turned into mothers and some at a time when they lost touch of who they were, physically present but emotionally absent but now they are no longer there with us. When they leave, a part of us dies too because the birther, the nurturer, the caregiver, has left us forever.
Mothers carry us in their womb, our first home. We live through her while she lives for us. Our breath, our well being becomes the melody of her life for nine months. And as we enter the earthly world through the birthing canal, the labour pain, the contractions binds us to our mother. With every dilation we can feel her pain, the pangs, the throb of her heart as she literally dies to welcome us. As we birth as a child, the mother in her is born too. From the cocoon of the womb, we enter her world where she holds us with tears of joy. And as she holds us, we feel her skin, her touch for the first time and yes we inhale her smell, we feel her happiness, we hear her excitement, we see her gentle, loving gaze and all our five senses come alive for the first time, right after we are born.
The mother rests now but the motherly instinct is pulsating, wanting her baby close to her. She feeds the baby and she knows when her baby is hungry because her breasts fill up with milk. Oh Mother ! There can be no one like you.
Soon we begin to recognize her and when we gurgle her world fills up with joy. She coos to us, rocks us, sings to us and our world is where she is. The first time when our fingers hold her finger, she rejoices at our first clasp. It's our way of saying "mama I know I can rely on you, you'll always be there for me". And when we reach out for her and say "ma ma", her joy knows no bounds. We love when she holds us close to her heart and the rhythm of her heart soothes us because that was the music which we heard 24×7, when we stayed in her womb. We can see her anguish when we cry. Tujhe sab hai pata meri maa.
That bond, that love , between her and us is absolutely divine. Since God could not be there everywhere, HE sent us mothers. As we grow, so does her love, which many a times gets a bit asphyxiating for us but she never bothers about that she couldn't careless because she is a mother. Our fights, our 'katti' with her, tugs at her heart and she is always the first to move towards us and hug us. Oh! Her lap still is so comforting that you can forget all your troubles and relax. Her hug is so enclosing that you feel your problems melting away tujhe sab hai pata meri maa.
Our first crush, our first date, we go confiding in her. How we hate it when she doesn't approve of it. But then who cares Her constant nudging 'par le exam hai', can drive us crazy. Her cooking our favorite dishes, holding things from our father to protect us (fathers are good fun too), sorting out fights with our siblings, driving us to school, our tuitions. So much we throw on her but then we know she is a Superwoman.
And soon when we are all set to get married, her two bit advice is brushed off laughingly. Her words "teri saas hi tujhe theek karegi" are met with our laughter. And as we move away from her nest to make our home, there are tears in her eyes for she knows that the baby bird is all set to fly. Our story becomes her story. If we're happy she is happy and if we're sad so is she. And soon we give her the wonderful news "mom, I'm going to become a mom" now she is laughing because she knows her journey is going to be repeated. But now she will be a naani or a daadi, a Grandmother.. mother's mother... the cycle begins again.
This is an ode to all the mother who lived and loved their children and are no longer with us and have moved on. They have left an indelible imprint upon our soul. We miss you, we remember you dear mom. I would like to offer this beautiful poem on the mother in the end Maavan thandiyaan chaavan.
Maavan bin dheeyan da hai,
Jod kehda, daaj ve.
Mool naalon rattha de ne,
Wadh de byaaj ve..
Ho Maavan to bin rangle jag diyan,
Ujdiyaan lagdiyan thaavan.
Leja iik suneha mera,
Ajj tu taldi da kaavan.
Veh keh deyin uss daade rabb nu,
Door kari naa dheeyan to maavan.
Maavan thandiya chaavaan 🌷🌷
Hello Zindagi 💞💞
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